8.16.14
Anonymous asks: You're a history teacher?

If the corduroy jacket with elbow patches fits!   

8.16.14

I’m teaching History at a new school starting on Monday. As of now my school doesn’t have computers, internet access, a copy machine, textbooks, or teacher’s guides. Never have I faced such a big “fake it ‘til you make it” challenge in my entire life. 

8.15.14

"I" before "E" except after you graduate college and forget how to "receipt".

8.10.14

Stores that skip back to school merchandize and go straight to Halloween stuff in August are kind of like that cool older couple who never had kids. They may be a little eccentric but we secretly want to wear their sweaters.

8.08.14

Anonymously message me Ten Things I Hate About You on DVD.

8.08.14

Your soul mate is out there but so is global warming. Tick tock.

8.06.14
As if today I’m officially living by myself in a cabin in the woods. While this is a dream come true,  I think it’s safe to assume that my posts are going to get weirder and more frequent.

As if today I’m officially living by myself in a cabin in the woods. While this is a dream come true, I think it’s safe to assume that my posts are going to get weirder and more frequent.

8.04.14

Don’t be silly. It’s NEVER too late! Wait, you’re in your 20s? Wow this is awkward. Yeah it’s definitely too late. Yeah you were totally supposed to do all the things already. You didn’t even do that whole credit card refundable tax with the graduation refinance your job skills thingy? Wow. What were you thinking?

8.03.14
8.02.14

Change is terrifying but so is remaining stagnant. That’s why the only reasonable way to move through live is to slowly inch forward while occasionally stepping back. Maybe you think you might be the kind of person who wears sunglasses. Slowly put them on and approach a mirror of some sort. Turns out you are not the type of person to wear sunglasses. Slowly back away from the mirror while removing the sunglasses. Have a seat. That’s enough carpe diem for today, champ.  

8.01.14
7.29.14
“ Briefness is sometimes confused for cleverness. ”
— Six Word Great American Novel Deconstructing The Shallowness Of Internet Culture And The Decline Of Original Thought In The Post-Postmodern Era While Also Presenting An Alternative Economic Model For Sustainability Through The Use Of Literature As a Means To Achieving World Peace
7.29.14

Radiator Hospital: Blue Gown

7.28.14

Here’s a horse drinking out of a hose.
(My username on snapchat is snapcrispy)

7.28.14

Growing vegetables in the intense Miami summer heat can be a big challenge. After doing a little bit of research I was able to grow some Dixie Specked Butterpeas and Everglades Tomatoes. Both are about the size of a penny and both love the sun. 

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